Et Tu Poison?




Adam: haven’t heard from her in years didn’t know if she just off and died like the other women you date
Brendan: thats happened once, and I had *almost nothing* to do with it!
Brendan: I mean, yeah… I bought the poison
Brendan: I slipped it into her food
Brendan: but the cause of death wasn’t "poison"
Brendan: it was liver failure
Adam: wouldn’t it have been poison
Adam: if they knew that’s what caused the failure?
Brendan: Oh sure, the poison caused the liver failure which caused the death.. but you can’t keep tracing these things back… it opens up a can of worms. Next thing you’ll be wanting to blame gas stations for automobile accidents.
Adam: What if they put soda in instead of gasoline, causing the accident?
Adam: or ‘introduced a fatal and liquid based element’ that otherwise wouldn’t have been there
Adam: into say, the car’s romantic dinner, while it signs it’s will over to you
Brendan: Wouldn’t that have been coca-colas fault for producing said soda?
Brendan: All I’m saying is that a person can’t live without a liver
Brendan: They can live perfectly well with poison. In fact, I have some in my trunk at this very moment.
Adam: while I think we’ve both proven that’s only partially true….
Adam: having it in your trunk isn’t really the same thing is it?
Adam: like living with someone isn’t ingesting them…
Adam: except that one party
Adam: (which was RAD by the by)
Brendan: Good times were had by all… Anyway, all this talk of poison has got me thinking about dinner. Care to join me?
Adam: sure sounds good
Adam: I …
Adam: wait
Adam: we haven’t discussed my will lately have we?
Brendan: Of course not! That would be crass… On an unrelated note, did I tell you that I have a friend who does life insurance policies? He will be joining us tonight.
Brendan: Please bring your birth certificate.
Adam: Oh you mean that shady guy who was friends with..
Adam: wait… why?
Adam: Honestly I’m so full from those brownies you left at my house this morning
Brendan: Just in case the mood to sign up for life insurance hits you
Adam: they were rich, and tasted roughly of almonds, although I didn’t see any
Brendan: You ate those?! Those were for Carrie. Who just signed up for life insurance with my friend I might add
Brendan: Lets move dinner forward a bit
Brendan: how’s right now for you?
Adam: But you know I keep my birth certificate in that same old folder in my bedroom, next to my stocks and bonds, jewels, and those never-used suicide notes that I wrote a few years ago
Adam: you know, as a joke
Adam: right now? I’d love to, but I feel a little dizzy
Adam: I guess I’ll be okay to drive
Brendan: You should probably drive extra fast though… get it done and over with.
Brendan: Oh
Brendan: and if you feel like you are going to crash… I hear that crashing into a red VW bug with licence plate 3HDK342 is the safest thing to do
Brendan: Try and hit on the driver side
Adam: k… texting.while driviiing
Adam: eyes.dim. going black.
Adam: slugbug
Brendan: -= fin =-
Adam: *claps*